Around the World 2024: Queenstown and New Zealand's Southlands

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Day 5, Wednesday 13th March in Melbourne to Queenstown (Accommodation #3)

After recovering from the shock of being ripped off by Uber (we paid $75 when they said it would be $45, cheaper than the Skybus x 2 which is mainly why we took it) and the frustration of not being able to lodge a complaint at their opaque, regimented web side, we settled at the airport to wait for the Air New Zealand flight.

The flight was OK in itself although we both soon decided to stop wearing our very restrictive face masks and one of the flight attendants was a bit grumpy.

Soon enough we were over the spectacular coast of the South Island, flying over mountain tops as we homed in on Queenstown in glorious sunshine.

It was much cooler once we got off the plane but it was brilliantly sunny and soon we were going through customs for the first time. We needed to explain why we were both carrying seven months supply of drugs but apart from that we were through without a hitch,

Once we realised we needed a Bee card to get on the bus (thanks to a very generous tourist about to leave) we were away from the airport and immediately stuck in a long traffic queue going into town.

In the town center we soon realised that major road works (they're building a town center bypass) right by our hotel meant we had to walk the long way from the bus stop to our room on the fourth floor. Mi Pad was great with many ultra modern lighting, heating and tv features.

Our pad at Mi Pad

Once we'd unpacked, and relaxed a bit (nudge nudge) we were off to explore the town centre and go on a walk in the beautiful Queenstown gardens by the massive, hugely impressive lake Wakatipu.

It's such a beautiful place, with ancient untouched woodlands with some amazing trees but one quickly becomes aware that this is very much, I would even say "exclusively", a tourist town. Pretty much everyone you see, even the staff working behind the bars, are tourists.

Still, once you accept that, you can just enjoy it. It's a bit like going to a playground as a kid. You know all the kids are only their to have a bit of fun before going back to the rest of their lives. Here too, in New Zealand's capital of adventure.

After our walk we stopped for a pint at The Waterfront. I ordered a meat pie. The meat was great but the "pastry" was a big disappointment - a square of some fluffy light filo type thing. That's not a pie!

Day 6 Thursday 14th March Scaling the heights in Queenstown

It was great to wake up in Queenstown, knowing we had two whole days in which we had nothing to do but have fun. We quickly hatched a plan to go up the impressive-looking cable car we'd seen the day before in the morning and then walk up the easy-sounding "Queenstown Hill" in the afternoon.

About to go up

The cable car was even more stunning than one could imagine although, it confused me that the tickets said "one gondola ride and three luges". I thought gondolas were what you might ride on in Venice and "luge"? That would be a pretty scary ride back down to the bottom, and we couldn't see anyone doing so. It must be up at the top somewhere.

Once at the top, the views were every bit as breathtaking as we hoped. Amazing.

After the mandatory selfie session it was time to find this luge thing. From the viewing platform you can see them whizzing by underneath back to the finish line and on the left you could see where people were climbing a traditional-looking chair lift to ascent back up to the top for another ride.

That was our next task, to find the bottom of the chair lift.

Of course I had to have the biggest helmet and Lesley, the normal size.

At the top you are split into "first timers" and "repeaters" - so the first time we went left and received basic instruction on steering and stopping the ground luge - a little trolley with an clever design that makes it very easy to slow down and steer

It was great fun it had just the right amount of scariness. Leb raced ahead of me as I tend to do these things like I drive - like a granddad.

Queuing up for our second turn was a guy from the US who was on the phone to one of his friends. Typically, loudly, he bellowed out his conversation for all to hear.

It seemed his friend was ill.

"May I say a prayer for you" he asked.

A God fearing American - no surprise there. But I wasn't quite ready for what followed - an actual prayer spoken as if he was conducting a sermon in a church.

"Lord Jesus Christ, we pray that you look down on us ... etc. etc. "

Do we really have to listen to this, sir?

Three luge rides was perfect. After which we took the chair lift to the top one more time and then walked down back to the sky center to catch our "gondola" back to base.

My plan back in the town, was to get a SIM card for the phone and a haircut for my head whilst Leb went back to the room.

The first bit went well but the barber was fully booked so I made an appointment for the next day.

After a snooze back in the room, we set off for our second adventure of the day, a "moderate" hike up Queenstown "hill".

The start point for the walk was located quite close to our hotel so this seemed like an easy option. It was supposed to take 2-3 hours, so that was perfect as the weather was good - crisp and fresh but glorious blue skies and brilliant sunshine.

All good in theory. But within five minutes of setting off I was already struggling. The streets at the edge of town leading to the "hill" were so steep it was knackering even getting to the start point.

Knackered already!

And it only seemed to get worse until we got well into the beautiful wooded low phase of the walk. There the pathway flattened out and we made good progress. Along the way we'd often get overtaken by younger, fitter walkers and even a young lady who was jogging up to the top!

The view kept getting better

Eventually, we came out of the forest onto more open land and reached the first target the aptly named, and beautiful "Basket of Dreams". There, we were met with jogging girl (yes... she was *jogging* up the 'hill') who assured us it was worth going all the way to "the top" another 500m higher up the "hill".

I must admit I had been ready to turn around at that point but I was persuaded to carry on.

It was worth it. The views at the top were amazing 360 degree views of the whole Queenstown area.

Once we'd reached the pinnacle, the only way was down. I reckon it took two hours to get to the top and an hour to get back down.

My knees were distinctly wobbly once we got back down onto flat ground again. It felt like having to learn to walk again.

Google says it should take 1 hour 12 minutes - but it took us 2 hours
to get to the top and an hour to get back

I went out for a couple of beers in the Locker Room sports bar and the Beech Tree before getting back for a frustratingly poor night's sleep.

Day 7 Friday 15th March Stepping back to 1912 on a steam ship

For our second full day in Queenstown we decided to spend the morning on an old steamer, the TSS Earnslaw. All the sensible times were fully booked so we had to go on the 9 am cruise and the weather was not as good as it had been the day before, but it was still a wonderful experience.

The weather wasn't as idyllic as this but...

It turned out to be a good thing as the water was calm and the promised rain did not arrive.

The coal-powered vessel has been fully functioning since 1912, about the same time as the Titanic and there were many reminders of the ship, especially looking down to the guys below shovelling in coal into the boilers to keep the massive steam engine turning over.

The views from the deck were stunning and the interior was quite luxurious, albeit not quite in the same league as that enjoyed by Rose Bukater and Carl Hockley.

Back on (cold) land we found a place to have a big breakfast - The Captain's table. It wasn't what you'd call first class but it ticked all the boxes for me.

After a refresh back at the hotel I set off to have the first of what I plan will be several haircuts in different countries.

The Gents barbershop Queenstown is unusual in that you have to pay in advance for he haircut but it was comfortable enough. My barber was a friendly English guy from Cambridge. It was a decent enough cut but I got the distinct impression this wasn't his main job.

He did point me in the direction of my next pub, Smiths, which has a good selection of beers and a stunning view of the mountains behind Queenstown.

After returning back to the pad, Leb and I went out again. It was bugging me, so we had to do it. The Fergburger queue wasn't so long so we decided to see what all the hype was about. After only a 15 minute wait we got to judge for ourselves.. not bad at all, but worth waiting half an hour for? I doubt it. Devil Burgers were just as good.

Then we went to a couple of pubs - my two favourites - Smiths again and then back to The Beech Tree.

We walked along the dock and saw our boat come in to mark the end of yet another tour.

Day 8 Saturday 16th March Driving South to Invercargill (Accommodation #4)

So, it was time to move to the next phase when we picked up our hire car and headed out of town for a long tour of New Zealand.

We caught the bus back to the airport where the company had sent us instructions as to where to wait for the shuttle bus to pick us up and take us to where our car was waiting.

Bye Bye MiPad

t'was a comfy stay

Bus ride back to the airport to pick up the car

Now, call me an idiot, but the map they sent me...

... indicated to me that the point where the shuttle arrives was away from the airport terminal.

Silly me. Leb, of course, realised this wasn't the case and after one of those embarrassing "I know best" sulks she walked me to the point clearly stated in the email.

"Look. Here's the Jetstar terminal. There's the blue lockers and there's the free phone."

"And look... here's the shuttle!"

Bashfully I got into the bus.

The driver was from Chile and it quickly became apparent he was a bit of a right winger, moaning about too many Venezuelan immigrants being allowed into his hoe country, clearly oblivious to the fact he was an immigrant here in New Zealand.

On reception were a lovely couple of Argentinians. It didn't take long before we were discussing the World Cup final and they couldn't resist showing me their video clips of Buenos Aires after the match.

After a quick check we were off south, along the fantastic lakes, stopping for a coffee and a brekkie roll at the Coffee Bomb in Garston before driving south to our first tour stop, Invercargill.

So much stunning scenery we had to keep stopping

Coffee Bomb

There was no-one at our accommodation to let us into our room at first so we drove to an estuary which looked a little bleak at low tide.

The room was pretty basic but it was only for one night.

Once we'd settled in we set off for Bluff, not quite the southern-most point on the New Zealand mainland but not far off.

The wind and rain kicked up as we arrived and our view from the lookout was an experience.

Not to be put off, we drove around the corner to a lovely old lighthouse post and then to a restaurant where we were able to sample the some famous Bluff oysters. Very nice indeed.

It was certainly very pleasant to get inside the restaurant from the cold wind.

On the way back to the motel I wanted to pop into the oldest pub in Invercargill which, according to Google, was the Speight Ale House. We managed to park close by and take advantage of the very comprehensive rain covering the town offers (obviously it rains a lot down there) to get to the pub which was, at best, a third full.

"Can I have a pint of Speights please"

The junior bar maid hesitated before her senior stepped in to tell me it was not going to happen.

"We have a large booking coming in tonight"

"But we'll only be here for twenty minutes. I only want a quick pint."

"Sorry"

And that was that. Luckily, the second oldest pub in Invercargill, Waxy's, was just a couple of hundred metres up the street so we went in there instead.

Then it was back to our cold accommodation for a rather uncomfortable night after I, rather predictably, fell asleep again on the couch.

Zonked out - again!

It was quite a cold night and unfortunately neither of us spotted the bed had an electric blanket!

I did get up in the middle of the night to check if, by any miracle, the clouds had parted to treat us with a magical aurora australis - but alas they hadn't. You can't expect everything to be perfect.

Almost as far south as you can go on the New Zealand mainland

Day 9 Sunday 17th March St Patrick's Day drive to Te Anau (Accommodation #5)

Next morning we set off from Invercargill along the southern coast, stopping at a few beaches and then the town of Riverton for breakfast.

There, two very cute and friendly girls were decked in green for St Patrick's day. The cafe, attached to a big DIY store on the banks of the river, provided great coffee and a heart breakfast.

New Zealand is famous for its sheep, which is why whenever any kiwi football team play in Perth the shed can't help themselves but chant "sheep. sheep. sheep-shaggers." And there certainly were many to be seen as we wound our way through the very English-like countryside.

We stopped at a couple more beaches before heading north to Te Anau.

Gemstone Beach - Mmm.

As we drove along we listening to various podcasts, including Ukraine the latest, which was reporting on the continually growing Russian influence in Georgia, which already has 20% of its land occupied by their big bullying northern neighbour.

The next stop was at Clifden Suspension bridge (not to be confused with Clifton Suspension Bridge near Bristol.)

The scenery became more hilly again for a while before we started to head down towards our next destination.

Then we stopped at a lovely scenic lookout around around 1:30 in the afternoon before heading toward the lovely lakeside town of Te Anau, where we would stay for two nights.

Upon arrival around 2pm, we had a walk along the lake into the town center to do a bit of shopping and procure some provisions for a slightly more healthy breakfast as we planned to get up early the next morning to drive to Milford Sound.

Day 10 Monday 18th March Milford... better than it Sounds

What was actually my Dad's 106th birthday was spent driving to the idyllic paradise that is Milford Sound for a 2 hour cruise to the sea and back.

We decided not to stop much on the way there, to make sure we got there in time for the cruise, but the scenery was still breathtaking. As we were easily on time, we did have one short stop for a walk in the woods but then it was back on the road.

The drive was spectacular enough in itself but once we arrived at Milford Sound we saw what all the fuss was about.

The boarding of our boat was very smooth and the water was very calm.

Again, we were lucky with the weather, although the barber in Queenstown had assured me it can actually be a good thing if it's raining as you see a better display of waterfalls.

We got there easily on time for our 11 am cruise, which was destined to take a couple of hours.

On the way back we had more time for stops.

And then it was through the very impressive, 1.2 km long, Homer tunnel.

Day 11 Tuesday, 19th March - Back to Queenstown and (not) following arrows to Arrowtown

The next day we were off again, leaving Te Anau and heading back towards Queenstown.

As on the way down, we spent plenty of time stopping regularly at spectacular lakeside lookouts. We decided to skip a return to the town and instead drove on to Arrowtown, an old mining town.

Here, we had another "dispute" about directions. I had faithfully followed Google Maps' advice to get to Arrowtown and, as our location was literally on the point of the red eye drop, I thought it logical that I didn't need to follow actual road signs any more. So, using my intuition, and because the road was right there in front of me, I didn't take the left the road sign suggested but carried on, assuming there would be a left soon enough. Wrong. Murphy's Law struck and of course, this time, there would be no left turn for miles. Leb, quite understandable asked after a few seconds "where are we going?"

"Arrowtown" I replied.

"So why did you not turn left at the last turn?"

Anyway, I did a U turn and went back to the junction where I did take a left and within minutes were were in the town center.

Leb 2 Algis 0

After a nice pie from the bakery and stroll up and down the main drag, we got back into the car and headed away from the south to the west coast of the South island.